Boycott the ‘Bachelor;’ Nominate Meghan McCain for the next ‘Bachelorette’
It’s time to start a movement, people. Fuck that dude, that Bachelor dude, who was apparently a pretty big dick or something. We don’t really know, we don’t watch that crap.
And screw those producers who apparently rigged the whole thing so the dude would dump his fiance for the hot second-place reject or something like that, so we hear.
And screw the producers of “The View” for conspiring with the other producers to make the Bachelor look like a dick so that the skinny conservative chick has something to shout righteously about without coming off like Jessica Simpson’s intellectual inferior.
Screw that whole show – it’s time to focus on the Bachelorette. That show is just as whack and it’s time to get some new blood in there. Some good ol’ fashioned red on red GOP blood! We officially demand that one-time aspiring first daughter Meghan McCain be seated as the next Bachelorette!
She like, totally deserves it. Do you know what kind of a rough year she’s had? Do you know how much she hates her dad? You should, because she told everyone in the Daily Beast a few days ago how hard it is dating after the election. Check it:
“Here’s the biggest surprise: I am not only turned off by people who voted for Barack Obama, but I am also turned off by people that voted for my dad—or more so, obsessive supporters of my dad. Recently, over dinner, a guy started explaining his reasons for supporting President Obama during the election (I didn’t ask, I think the poor guy felt guilty) and I immediately found any attraction I had previously had dissipate. But same thing happens if a guy starts talking about all the reasons why my father should be president. I have the ultimate Catch-22 in post-election dating. So where does that leave me, and who exactly am I attracted to? Let’s just say I’m spending a lot of time writing and even more time with my girlfriends.”
Are you ratings whores at ABC paying attention? This is fucking gold! And you don’t even have to pay JJ Abrams to do acid all day someplace on Maui.
More importantly though, this is about getting rid of those backstabbing bachelorettes and putting a more deserving and overprivileged candidate in the hot seat.
Support our demands by echoing your nomination of Meghan McCain in the comments below, or feel free to nominate a more deserving Bachelorette if you can dream one up.
NOTE: Nominating Sasha or Malia Obama is not as funny as you think, trust us.
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