Blagojevich Indicted, WBR to Argue in His Defense
Hear no Evil, See No.... - ah fuck it!
Well, not really – we’re still pretty sure he’s almost a complete fucker. But now that it’s official that Blago will be going to trial to face federal corruption charges, we thought we’d get a jump on things, Johnnie Cochran style – and get to work on the Big Hair’s possible defense strategies.
Here’s our top three so far:
3. Pull off that mask (and wig) to reveal that he’s really… some actor. Guess what, America? You’re on ABC’s hit “What Would You Do?” with that guy that looks like Edward James Olmos! We found 20% of informed populaces would have tried Blago in the court of public opinion – maybe next time we’ll join the silent majority that would have opted for stoning.
2. Innocent by reason of temporary insanity brought on by faulty hair plugs that managed to pierce the scalp and take root in the center of the brain that controls morality and judgment.
1. One word – terets.
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