WreckingBallReport.com

Bring it On, Kim!

News that North Korea, the perennial Eric Cartman of North Asia, has launched its sixth test missile in recent weeks was overshadowed by whatever the hell that creepy kid down the street is up to now.

“Kim Jong Il, that guy doesn’t have the balls to actually do shit, but that kid that lives down across from the Weaver house, he worries me,” says my neighbor Ed. “I heard he’s been looking up all kinds of crazy stuff on the Internet, probably gets it off that TwitterBook or whatever.”

Ed then rushed inside to field a call from his daughter, one of the journalists currently detained in North Korea, who told him not to worry, and advised him to keep a close on the kid down the street because she recalled seeing him doing some “pretty weird stuff” to some frogs he had caught down by the crick.