WreckingBallReport.com

The world’s most prominent assholes of the moment, those pesky Somali pirates floating in the Indian Ocean with Captain Richard Phillips of the Maersk Alabama as hostage, have communicated that they are demanding a ransom and safe passage to the shore in exchange for his release. That non-specific list of demands is nothing surprising, but [...]

UPDATE: Kal’s Going from White Castle to the White House. Seriously, this time. (Click here) Wow – must be a really slow news day.  All the buzz on the internet in the last few hours has centered around the death of Kal Penn, or at least the death of his character on “House.” Within just [...]

Well, not really – we’re still pretty sure he’s almost a complete fucker. But now that it’s official that Blago will be going to trial to face federal corruption charges, we thought we’d get a jump on things, Johnnie Cochran style – and get to work on the Big Hair’s possible defense strategies. Here’s our [...]

Obie One committed a bit of a faux pas last month when he presented Prime Minister Gordon Brown and his family with an array of welcome gifts that could have easily been purchased at Dollar Tree. So, to avoid further egg on the face, or puke in the lap, in the grand tradition of Bush [...]

So the panic is on, but we at WBR are partying like it’s 1999 – The last time we remember a computer meltdown scare this big that turned out to be nothing. It’s already April 1st in much of the world – the date that is supposed to “turn on” the Conficker worm on windows [...]

President Obama held a first-of-its kind online town hall this week, and the White House was flooded with over 100,000 questions in advance. Although 95,000 of the questions were asking Obama if he wanted to “make his P3niz much longer by trying Ciali$,” the online whoozy-whatsit was deemed a major success and the supersexy cyber [...]

So Congress has approved a 90 % tax on those controversial bonuses paid to taxpayer-owned pariah AIG, in a law that goes after about a half-dozen dickwads who may have helped collapse the global economy. But the move is also being criticized as an improper use of legislative powers that undercuts our system of contract [...]

It seems the phrase “they just don’t get it” was made for these times we’re living in. For years, we thought it was mostly socially awkward teens and co-workers that “didn’t get it,” but only now are we beginning to understand the phrase’s true meaning. Now that we’re getting to know these first-rate inept crap [...]

So fraudster Bernard Madoff is officially guilty of bilking plenty of Americans out of billions, taking cash and promising to invest it and guaranteeing too-good-to-be-true returns. Of course, those returns came from other investors in a grand reverse pyramid Ponzi scheme that never actually invested in anything other than keeping Madoff neck deep in hookers, [...]

Ok, so you’ve been fired and you’re facing foreclosure, homelessness, maybe your wife has left you, taken the kids and your world is shit. We get it, it blows. But it’s time to nut up, not melt down. Maybe you’re tired of fuckwads like me telling you what to do and how to live your [...]